Growing Grateful Kids: Sewing Seeds of Humility

Growing Grateful Kids: Sewing Seeds of Humility
Given by Susie Larson

If you don't remember anything else from this post, remember this:

* We can not impart on our children what we do not possess!

• We must believe that God specially made us to live in this time and society. Never before has it been so important to raise world changers.
  
• We can not expect our children to do something that we are not doing ourselves.
• We have to believe the lessons that we're teaching them because most lessons are caught, not taught.
  

How can we grow grateful children?

Way #1: Model Thankfulness

• 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
• Change the way you see things. The way we view things effects the way we say things.
• Practice Gratitude. Don't wait for things to get better, be grateful in your current situation.
• Don't think you deserve more. Children pick up on our attitudes, so get rid of the mind set that you "deserve more than God has given you". Why would we want our children to believe this?
• Refuse Worry. Worry will steal your grateful heart, refuse to acknowledge it! Say out loud "Dear God, this bad situation feels very true right now, but I know that you ARE true."
  
• Spend time with God. Get His perspective on the situation through the Bible and prayer.
  
• Start a Thankfulness Journal. Record something every day that you are thankful for. If your kids are old enough, record something that every family member is thankful for everyday.
• Let kids hear you express gratitude. Even over the littlest things!
• Teach kids to pray out loud. When they start young, praying will be like breathing to them. This is important.
• Never use guilt. Don't pull out the "there are starving children in Africa" line in order to get your kids to finish their dinner.
• Teach compassion. For everyone, those across the street, and across the world.

Way #2: Practice Self Restraint

• Just because doesn't mean we should. Just because there is food in the fridge, doesn't mean we should eat it. Just because we want something, doesn't mean we should buy it.
• Prove to your children that their character means more. Cancel plans, walk out of the store, whatever it takes, but prove to your children that their character poor behavior and lack of self restraint are not acceptable. Susie suggests that you literally say to your child, "Hunter, I would have loved to have been able to check out and purchase all of those groceries, but your character means more to me than that cart load of items. I will not let you behave that way, because that is not how God expects us to act."
  
• Proverbs 25:28: Like a city whose wall are broken down, is a man who lacks self control".
• Let nothing have power over you. When you find that there is something that has power over yourself of your children, whether it's the morning coffee, or their latest video game, remind them that "you are stronger than you think, and NOTHING has that power over you except God."
• Fast. Although most people think of fasting as a time to give up food, really, you can fast from anything. If you find that you are getting crabby when you don't have your morning cup of coffee, maybe it has more hold over you than it should...fast from it, until you have build up enough self restraint to handle it properly.
  
• Give God room to work. Tell God "I want you more" than I want ____." Then give Him room to work in your life.
• Grab God. Ask Him "what do you want out of my hands so that I can grab more of you?" Sometimes our hands are so full of things (both good and bad) that we don't have any more free space to grab God.
• Ask God. "God, give me a heightened sense of my kids addictions and tendencies, so I can help them learn self restraint where they need it."
• Build muscle. Just like you build arm muscles when you lift weights, you will build heart and soul muscles when you say no to yourself. As you need arm muscles to protect yourself from the crazy world we live in, you also need heart and soul muscles to protect yourself from this same world.
  

Way #3: Take time to play.

• Life is precious. It is worth celebrating. When you take time to play, it shows your kids that more rests on God's shoulders than rests on yours. This is such an important lesson to learn!
• Simply play with your kids!

Way #4: Teach Forgiveness

• Forgiveness reinforces families. Forgiveness is a constant, steady process.
• Let consequences exist. Just like our Heavenly Father, we must let consequences exist for our children, but let them be secure in the fact that your grace will always be in place, as it is always there with God.
• Let them know they are too important. Children need to know that they are too important to you and to God to make poor choices.
• Pray daily. Pray for those you find it difficult to forgive, and for those that you will need to forgive in the future.
• Leave the past behind. Be prepared to daily receive God's provisions.
• Admit your mistakes. Let your kids know when you've messed up. Ask for forgiveness from them and pray out loud to model to them asking forgiveness from God.
• Be in it together. Let your kids know that you are all in this life together. Whatever they allow into their lives effects everyone else in the family because you are all in it together!

Steps in the forgiveness process:

1. Own and admit your offense.
2. Humbly ask for forgiveness from the necessary person and from God.
3. Take responsibility for your actions and serve the consequences.
4. Humbly embrace the forgiveness given by God.
   

Way #5: Give a Blessing

• Give a blessing to your children. Kids don't know who they are, we need to tell them. Too many people will give your kids negative definitions (hyper, whiny, crabby, etc.). We need to make sure that we take the time to tell them who they are in Christ. Look them straight in the eye and tell them what we see in them and who they are in Christ.
• Separate choices from person. Make sure our children are never "bad boys", or "bad girls". They may make bad choices, but they are not a bad person. Keep their choices separate from who they are as a person.
• Tell your kids the truth. Although we need to reassure our children constantly in this society, we also need to be able to tell them the truth. We need to be able to confront laziness or median effort. They will not always be the BEST at everything. If we always tell them that, they won't be prepared to enter the world.
  
• Remind them. Remind them daily that they are the object of God's affection. God is crazy in love with them, and you!
• Recast a Godly vision. During discipline, recast a Godly vision on why you are disciplining them, not just a worldly vision on why their actions weren't good choices.

and remember...

If it's real to you, it will be real to them.

You can not impart on your children what you do not possess...
so if you want grateful children, you need to be a grateful parent!