As I re-read my posts in the past, I have talked about my children a lot. I realized that I have not talked much about my views on parenting, or my parenting style. I had a request to blog about my recent adventure to Rolla's first World Breastfeeding Day (I will get to that soon), and so, I thought I would start a new "daily" post, each day (for awhile) addressing a specific issue that I find important in parenting.
Please know ahead of time that I am well aware that not everyone is going to agree with me. Some may think I'm "out there"...others may think I'm judgemental. Please, I'm begging you...don't! I will make it perfectly clear when I'm talking about something that I am judging others on...most of the time I am just going to be stating how I choose to raise my children. If you choose otherwise - great! Whatever works for you and your family!!! :0)
Let's start from the beginning - pregnancy!
I know that not every pregnancy is planned...but there are options. First of all, if you are not able / do not want to take care of the baby that you are carrying...please do the responsible thing and give it up for adoption. Give the child a chance! Did you know that your babies heart is beating before you even know you're pregnant?! So yes - I'm against abortion. I'm not ashamed to say it. On the other hand, this does not mean that I do not like anyone who has ever had an abortion! (In fact, one of my very best friends in college had one when she was much younger). I know everyone makes poor choices and can repent their sin and regret the decision. Everyone can change.
My pregnancy with my son was not planned. My husband and I were not married yet. (although our wedding was in the planning stages for the following August). I was SHOCKED when I found out, much more upset by the news than Lincoln (he was thrilled, very excited to be having a child) - but after 24 hours the news had sunk in and I was excited as well. It's everything I had ever wanted, just wasn't when I had planned it. (and for those of you who know me well know...I am a PLANNER!) Lincoln and I were lucky that my family was extremely supportive of us and encouraged us all the way. I'm sad that not everyone's families can look at the fact that a baby is a baby and whether or not it's coming into the world under "the perfect" circumstances, they should be excited...what's not to be excited about when it comes to a baby?!?!
I believe in giving your child the best chance possible to develop healthy and happy.
I think that you should be taking your prenatal and folic acid (before you get pregnant if you're trying...) and should continue to take them the whole pregnancy. If your body doesn't need that much, it will dispose of it...they're never going to HURT you!
I believe that if you are trying to get pregnant you should be "religious" about praying for God's timing in this event in your life and for your future baby and your marriage. Marriage takes a hard hit when you get pregnant and have your first child. It's an adjustment that no one could possibly be prepared for. Any marriage, no matter how strong, will go through downs during this time.
I believe that you should act as if you are already pregnant (give up caffine and alcohol, etc.) if you are trying. You know there are 4-6 weeks when your baby is developing before you even know you're pregnant!
I believe that you should be eating healthy and resting as much as possible. (This means lots of fruits and veggies and no caffeine or alcohol!) No, I don't say this to get pregnant women out of housework, continuing to work outside of the home, etc. Pregnancy is hard on your body to begin with...and I think most of us know that if we're physically tired, we're normally mentally and emotionally exhausted as well. I'm a believer in the idea that your baby develops the temperament that you have while you're pregnant (this is one of the places where you might think I'm "out there"). I've seen too many kids whose mom is a laid back, chill kind of lady who are also that kind of kid...and then the kids whose mothers are high anxiety, high emotional, high activity who are exactly the same!
I believe in getting medical care from the start - and continuing for the entire pregnancy. This is not to say that I don't think Douala's, etc. aren't wonderful - and a terrific addition to your OB's care!
I believe in reading and talking to your child in the womb (also rubbing your tummy in a counter clock-wise motion - this I believe brings a positive energy to the baby). This also applies to the father / siblings / grandparents / aunts and uncles, etc. I think that if you take time to talk specifically to your child they will feel the love that you have for them earlier on, which will develop a healthier baby, mentally and physically. I think that it shows that you are willing to take time out of your schedule already for this child who will become a life-long love of your life!
I believe in reading all the information you can get your hands on...for every pregnancy! This will help you make more educated decisions about the way that you will act during your pregnancy and how you will handle your childbirth and raising your children. I was amazed at how the information changed between each of my pregnancies...so even if you've done this before...read again - this child is just as worth it as your first one was!!!
Tomorrow's subject - childbirth! :0)
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