this morning I fell out of bed on my knees.

literally.
Never before have I been so completely terrified.
Never before have I lived this many days with the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I woke up this morning, having not shaken the feeling overnight, and decided there was no better way to deal, than to turn it over to the One who can calm all my fears. So, this morning, I rolled out of bed and straight onto my knees.

I prayed for peace, patience, and the motivation to complete my to do list rather than just hugging Hunter and Graysen all day.

I prayed for safe travels, for Hunter and Graysen's hearts during the time while we're gone. I prayed for those who will be keeping them, I prayed for Sintayehu and Bizayehu.

I told God I was turning all of these fears and insecurities over to Him. It's only been a few hours since I woke up and I'm already fighting the urge to take back the worries.

I keep telling myself that He would not have gotten us this far in the process if NOW was not the time for these boys to join our family. We would not be preparing to fly to Africa in 6 days if God hadn't planned and blessed this entire journey. His hand prints are all over the whole adoption and I've got to keep remembering that. Remembering the miracles that have happened over the last year, and the people who have been His hands and feet during our journey.

Here's to a great day together, further preparing our hearts and home for two more precious children of God!