Graysen,
Today you turned one. I was very scared a year ago today. I wasn't convinced that even though you were born that God would let me keep you. Yes, I loved you when they laid you on my chest, but I kept a distance in my heart. You have torn through that wall and I can not imagine life without you ever being in it. You have saved me. You have restored my faith in the good of the world. I will forever be grateful for that.
I'm amazed at how you have developed over the past year. You are a beautiful little girl, both in and out. I adore your big brown eyes, your sweet blonde hair with wisps over your ears and on your neckline, and your fingers that wrap around mine. I love the faces you make with your cheesy smile and scrunched up nose; your teeth with a space between the top middle ones, the way you have 4 on top and only 3 on the bottom. You have such a calm personality. You are an extremely happy baby, only recently have you started to weary of strangers. You bring such joy and happiness into our home.
Last night as your Dad and I lay in bed we talked about what our lives were like a year ago. We went to the hospital on the evening of the 27th thinking that we were going to be induced and have a baby. Once we got there Dr. Karrie Cunningham came in and explained that there had been some miscommunication. We were only to be observed, not actually induced. Your Dad and I tried to convince her to let us stay and go ahead and have the baby (I was already having some natural contractions), but she explained that if there were any complications with you when you were born she would rather it not be in the middle of the night when every emergency response team is a bit slower. That's all she had to say, we were okay with going home, only to return in less than 12 hours. Hunter was spending the night with Grammie, so we just left him there, as not to confuse him. We came home to an empty house, knowing that the next time we entered we would have TWO children with us. It was so hard to fathom at that point, and so hard to imagine the opposite now, just one year later. We got up in the morning and had to check in at the ER entrance. We went upstairs, started the pitocin, and we were on our way! It didn't take long for Mommy's contractions to kick into high gear...I knew you were going to come fairly quickly. Grammie came to Rolla and dropped Hunter off with Rita Wells. She came on to the hospital and helped your Daddy try to comfort me during the toughest of labor. By 9:30 we knew that you were going to be here very soon and we called Aunt Sissy out of school (she was going to cosmetology school in Rolla at the time), Grandma from work (she was working at Triad in Rolla) and Rita to bring your big brother. Aunt Sissy got there right after the nurse told me I was a 10 and was able to give me a quick hug before Dr. Cunningham came in to deliver you! There was an intern with her and so she showed him how to do everything. I pushed one time and there you were! You were 7 lbs. 1 oz., 20 inches, and were born at 9:51 a.m. You were READY to meet your family! I should've known then you were going to be a very easy going baby! Although there weren't any major complications you had trouble keeping your body temperature up, so they wisked you away to the warmer very quickly after you were born. Our family was able to come back, but just to see us, Dr. Sean McEnaney was looking you over in the nursery. You took to nursing pretty well, although you weren't very interested after you went into your "sleep stage". I even called the lactation consultant in for suggestions on ways to wake you up and make you eat! We wanted to get out of the hospital and back home as soon as possible, so we left the hospital 26 hours after you were born.
I think every girl wants to know the story of her birth, so there it is. Your birth was a wonderful experience. Holding you for the first time was like nothing else in the whole world. We had prayed for you for almost 2 years before you were even conceived, and then we continued to pray for you the entire 9 months that you grew in my tummy. You are proof that God does answer prayers in the way that we hope at times.
Today, your first birthday, was a fairly quiet day around our house. You have a cold, runny nose, cough, breathing difficulties, so we gave you lots of medicine, nose wipes, and breathing treatments. Mommy baked about 70 cupcakes for your birthday party on Sunday and Aunt Sis, Grammie, Charlie, and Jamie came over for cake after dinner. We sang you happy birthday. You weren't real sure what to think about it, but after we were all done you decided it was good enough to clap for. :0)
I love you with all of my heart - you have made me into who I have become over the last year, and I couldn't be happier about it.
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