Welcome 2010!

As I sit here in my dear friend's living room watching my two children play legos with her oldest, I am filled with peace and happiness.

Today is the last day of 2009. It's been a rather quiet year in the Redburn family. For that, I am thankful. We were talking a few nights ago about how it's so nice to be actually living our lives rather than just planning them. For so many years I was stuck in a "planning" phase. I was deciding what I wanted to "be" when I grew up. I was looking for the person God had intended for me to marry. I was planning how many children we would have, when, and how. Where we would live, how we would pay the bills, what we would do for extra curricular activities. So many things to plan, so little time to enjoy the life that was passing me by.

I feel like this year I have actually lived my life. I have been in the moment more than any other year of my life. I have stepped out in faith to fulfill a dream of mine, I have visited with friends, I have experienced new things. I have enjoyed my children.

My husband will soon walk in the front door with a coffee for me. We will spend the rest of the day sitting and visiting with our friends, we will play with the children, we will laugh and maybe even cry. We will eat good food, and celebrate our families and friendship.

I hope this feeling continues all through the new year.

I'm officially back!

Yea! I have a computer - all set up and connected to the internet! I even have a printer this time around! So, I'm back. I've got to get back in the swing of putting my thoughts and feelings onto "paper". I'm not even sure where to start honestly. I thought it would be like riding a bike, but I must say...it's not. Not for me anyway.

So - anyone have anything they wanted to know about while I was gone? Any requests to get me started again?

Actually, I kind of lied...we are leaving this afternoon for a 3 day visit with some of our best friends. We can't wait to get out of town and leave all of the Christmas choas behind. We can't wait to play with our friends kids and see how much they have grown and changed since we last saw them. We are thrilled to be able to let our kids interact with them again. I can't wait to hug and kiss and take lots of pictures! I personally am glad to be getting away for a mini vacation before the busyness of second semester hits us again. I'm glad to avoid my post Christmas - end of February depression for another week.

So, I might not be around this week - I'm going to be soaking in the goodness of friends.

Confession

I'm getting antsy. I called in for our 1 month update, but haven't called back since. Don't get me wrong, there has been pleanty of communication specifically with us as a family, and as an adoptive parent with AAI in general...but I'm just longing for more. I know exactly where we stand on the list and where they are on handing out referrals on that list.

Let's be honest. I'm longing for a face and a name.

I've been told "early spring"...so, I'm praying for the next few months to keep me busy, but still soaking in the memories with only two children at home. We are leaving for a week to visit with very good friends (and stay up late dreaming about our two boys from ET!). Then I'm hoping another girlfriend and her son will come visit for a few days in early January. We'll be going back to work and school. February is filled with Claire's Birthday, Valentine's Day, and our 6 year anniversary. March will hold spring break and Lincoln's birthday and then I'd say we'll be in "early spring" right?!?! :0)

So, son, we're ready for you. Ready for you to bring so many blessings, love, and memories into our family. We're ready to give you stability, love, a family, and to teach you about God's endless love.

To my Zumba Ladies...

I feel really silly about this, but it's fact, so I must share.

I absolutely love each of the women that come to my Zumba classes 3 nights a week.

Every class is made up of different women, some coming multiple times a week, some just once.

I am blessed to spend time with a group of amazing women - all coming from different backgrounds and current life circumstances.

I am learning something from each of them and I greatly appreciate the sacrifices some of them have to make in order to be there with me for an hour each evening.

I get to laugh with them and forget for an hour of fun, silly dancing that there is anything else in the world to be worried about.

I am motivated by them. They encourage me to work harder at certain aspects of my life.

I am creating friendships. I get to chat with them during class (when we can find our breath!) and afterwards.

I have been able to share my passion for adoption and also witness and invite someone to church.

Some of my silly "Mommy fears" have been relieved by them. I have been able to encourage some that are striving to be Mommies, but aren't quite yet.

I finally feel an obligation, and responsibility to someone other than my children and husband. I find this very fulfilling.

I need to be there those 3 nights a week for them - and they are there for me.

I love you ladies!

Your Only Sister

I swore I would never let myself do this. You all must know that admitting this happened is a huge step for me. I'm very ashamed and there's no sarcasam here. This is a major confession.

Ashley: "Hunter, PLEASE be nice to Graysen. She is your only sister and I hate to see you treat her that way."

Hunter: "She is not my only sister Mom, I have a sister Claire too!"



I am so glad that he thinks of her, just like I do...and I can't wait until we're all together as one happy family in Heaven.

Parenting at all times

Whew. Parenting is an exhausting job. I think it gets harder the older the kids get (sorry to burst anyone's bubble who has a baby right now...). They understand so much more, they follow your example so much more closely. They copy everything that comes out of your mouth.

As a baby you get a break while you shower (even if they are in the bouncy seat in the bathroom with you), and you get a break while you use the restroom.

Not anymore.

A few days ago Lincoln was sitting on the toilet (I know, TMI), and called Hunter into the bathroom to discuss something that he had just heard him say to Graysen.

Amazing. No longer do you even get a break from parenting while you are in the bathroom!!!


I am so thankful for a husband who values the importance of being present with the children and taking an active, hands on approach to parenting. He could have taken the easy road and pretended that he didn't hear what Hunter had said (or really not heard him). But instead he took an active parenting role and helped to teach Hunter the right way to treat others.

Earned or a Given? A poll for my readers

Is the title of Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt or Uncle something that someone should automatically get just because another human in that relation to them is born?





Or is it a title that should be earned?





Sure, we should probably call those people by those titles out of respect, but should we automatically feel that "special" way about them just because of our birth order?





I don't think so. I want my kids to know that I worked hard (and will continue to) to earn my standing as their Mom. I want them to know that I don't take that responsibility or title lightly. I want them to understand that I willingly sacrificed, I prayed for wisdom, I did research and professional development.





I also hope that they know that I don't take being a Mom and Dad team lightly. I hope that they are able to see the work that Lincoln and I have put into our marriage. I hope they understand that it's not an easy thing - marriage...but it's worth the fight, sacrifice, and daily work. We do it because God has asked this of us - but also because THEY are worth it. Our family unit is worth it.

I read this somewhere and I think it's very fitting to this post:

"... My name means - I will never leave you, I am in your corner, I am your safe place, I will guide you all the days of your life, I will never give up on you, I will treasure who you are, I will be there when you fall and help you get up, I will help you learn from your mistakes, I will not judge you, I will teach you about the one and only GOD ..."

What do you readers think? Do you think a certain feeling and respect should be given to those people in your life even if they do nothing to deserve or earn the title?

5 months

Well, it has almost been 5 months of waiting. We're starting to feel anxious about seeing the face our own new one, but are still trying our best to be patient and wait on God's perfect timing. We're hoping that the wait is 1/2 over and we'll get some news on our new addition by early spring.

I actually started trying to plan out approximate referral date / court date / travel time. Then I stopped. I realized that that is where people run into the dissapointment in adoption. When they start trying to plan rather than leaving the planning up to God and what He sees fit for their family. Thank goodness I caught myself early, that's all I have to say!

We are very busy during this season of our lives, so the wait has not been excruciating yet! I am staying at home with the kids during the day and teaching at The Dance Studio 3 nights a week. Lincoln is working at PCR during the day (most weeks) and is still at the Walmart DC on the weekend day shift. He is also coaching Boys JV Basketball right now, so that keeps him extra busy with practice every day and games 2 nights a week. Hunter is in pre-school two mornings a week and Graysen has started dance 1 night a week.

Aside from all of our regularly scheduled activities we have lots of family and friends to keep us busy during this Holiday Season!

What will they remember?

I just finished reading "Vanishing Act" by Jodie Picult. It was terrifying and amazing all at once. It sure made me think though...

What will my kids remember about these first few years of their lives? I don't have many true memories until I was much older. I'm honestly not sure I remember anything until 3rd grade maybe?! Is that possible?! Nothing tragic happened to make me forget or push that time in my life to the back of my mind. I just simply don't remember much. Sure, pictures jog my memory...or maybe it's just the memory of the stories my mom has told me while looking at those pictures. Who really knows?

I know one thing for sure. I want my kids to remember the nights that I rocked them to sleep while whispering songs or prayers rather than the nights I let them cry themselves to sleep. I want them to remember the nights I welcomed them into my bed rather than shooing them back to their own. I want my kids to remember the times that we played together rather than the times that I told them to wait or "no" because I was busy doing something selfish like checking email or wanting to finish a book.

I feel very guilty on the nights where I've hit my "wall" right before bed time. The nights that I snap at Hunter as I'm putting him to bed or have to threaten Graysen with a "smack on the bottom" if she gets out of her bed one more time. I hate going to sleep on those nights. I find it really hard to fall asleep. It's just not the same going to bed when we've left off on rough standings.

I've found that as a parent it's very hard to ask forgiveness from your children. My pride, my standing as an authority figure often times stands in my way from doing what's right. I'm going to be better at this. I'm going to show them what humilty looks like rather than just preaching it at them...

starting right now.

A Return?

Just in time for Christmas...I hope!

We've finally gotten a computer (a desktop, but hey, who's being picky right?!) and hope to have it all fixed and set up before Christmas.

So, if everything goes as smoothly as it's supposed to, I'll be back to blogging by Christmas.

hope to blog with you soon!

Ash

In Process Update

Dear Adoptive Family,

For families who will be traveling soon, we have some news. Little AHOPE is in a new location. It is now closer to Layla, the Ritmo and the Yilma Hotel but further from the AHOPE guest house. That may affect where families picking up a child from Little AHOPE choose to stay.

AAI is now offering an additional guest house possibility for adoptive families wishing to have their child with them while they are in Ethiopia. This is the Ethiopia Guest Home. It is 30 to 45 minutes from Layla depending on traffic, somewhat more expensive but it has positive aspects as well. Details are now in the travel packet. Ethiopia Guest House’s website is at www.ethiopiaguesthome.com. Now our traveling families may choose either the Ritmo Guest House, the AHOPE Guest House, the KM guest rooms or the Ethiopia Guest Home if they want to have their children with them while they are in Ethiopia. Again, if you wish to stay in a hotel such as the Hilton or Sheraton, you are not allowed to have your children there by order of the Ethiopian government.

More good news: For families who have not yet had court hearings, the amount of time between filing cases and hearing dates is much shorter than it was a year ago. Most cases are scheduled for 4 to 6 weeks from filing. Last year is was 12 to 14 weeks.

There continues to be more and more scrutiny of adoption agencies as well as individual cases. At Layla today they were surprised by a visit from officials with the Ministry of Women’s Affairs and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. Here is Temesgen’s report:

We have been surprised by two visitors--one from MOWA and the other from Ministry of Foreign Affairs. They checked all our activities from documents to the kitchen utensils. They saw our contracts with our staff, the administration manual, and documents in relation to the project agreements that we signed with different stake holders. We were asked about the number of children we have placed so far, the procedures that we follow to track the whereabouts of the children, [this means post placement reports, folks!] orphanages that we are working with, our source of income, lists of our property etc.

I don't understand the purpose of the visit. But I guess that they are doing this for purpose of re-registration. The new NGO agency may decide not to re-register all agencies. There may some agencies that lose their licenses to operate in Ethiopia. After the visit we got positive feedback from both ministries.
Our re-registration will begin from Nov. 9, 2009.

With regard to referrals, we have referred several toddlers in the past few days. Gail reports that there are 12 to 14 babies and toddlers who are two or under whose files are not complete, so we hope to be able to refer them soon. For infant boy referrals, the next ones will go to families whose dossiers went in March of 2009. For infant girls, a couple of families who were on hold status came off and that means there hasn’t been much movement on that list. The next referral of an infant girl will go to a family whose file had been on hold and the next to the last family whose dossier went in November of 2008.

The office will be closed for staff training on Friday Nov. 6 and Wednesday Nov. 11, for Veteran’s Day, though Susan will be notifying families of court news on Wednesday.

Merrily and Susan
merrily@adoptionadvocates.org
susan@adoptionadvocates.org

In Process Update

Dear Adoptive Family,

For families who will be traveling soon, we have some news. Little AHOPE is in a new location. It is now closer to Layla, the Ritmo and the Yilma Hotel but further from the AHOPE guest house. That may affect where families picking up a child from Little AHOPE choose to stay.

AAI is now offering an additional guest house possibility for adoptive families wishing to have their child with them while they are in Ethiopia. This is the Ethiopia Guest Home. It is 30 to 45 minutes from Layla depending on traffic, somewhat more expensive but it has positive aspects as well. Details are now in the travel packet. Ethiopia Guest House’s website is at www.ethiopiaguesthome.com. Now our traveling families may choose either the Ritmo Guest House, the AHOPE Guest House, the KM guest rooms or the Ethiopia Guest Home if they want to have their children with them while they are in Ethiopia. Again, if you wish to stay in a hotel such as the Hilton or Sheraton, you are not allowed to have your children there by order of the Ethiopian government.

More good news: For families who have not yet had court hearings, the amount of time between filing cases and hearing dates is much shorter than it was a year ago. Most cases are scheduled for 4 to 6 weeks from filing. Last year is was 12 to 14 weeks.

There continues to be more and more scrutiny of adoption agencies as well as individual cases. At Layla today they were surprised by a visit from officials with the Ministry of Women’s Affairs and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. Here is Temesgen’s report:

We have been surprised by two visitors--one from MOWA and the other from Ministry of Foreign Affairs. They checked all our activities from documents to the kitchen utensils. They saw our contracts with our staff, the administration manual, and documents in relation to the project agreements that we signed with different stake holders. We were asked about the number of children we have placed so far, the procedures that we follow to track the whereabouts of the children, [this means post placement reports, folks!] orphanages that we are working with, our source of income, lists of our property etc.

I don't understand the purpose of the visit. But I guess that they are doing this for purpose of re-registration. The new NGO agency may decide not to re-register all agencies. There may some agencies that lose their licenses to operate in Ethiopia. After the visit we got positive feedback from both ministries.
Our re-registration will begin from Nov. 9, 2009.

With regard to referrals, we have referred several toddlers in the past few days. Gail reports that there are 12 to 14 babies and toddlers who are two or under whose files are not complete, so we hope to be able to refer them soon. For infant boy referrals, the next ones will go to families whose dossiers went in March of 2009. For infant girls, a couple of families who were on hold status came off and that means there hasn’t been much movement on that list. The next referral of an infant girl will go to a family whose file had been on hold and the next to the last family whose dossier went in November of 2008.

The office will be closed for staff training on Friday Nov. 6 and Wednesday Nov. 11, for Veteran’s Day, though Susan will be notifying families of court news on Wednesday.

Merrily and Susan
merrily@adoptionadvocates.org
susan@adoptionadvocates.org

In Process Update

Dear Adoptive Family,
I (Merrily) was in Ethiopia two weeks ago where I caught a terrible cold. My work was primarily to meet with our legal staff and social workers so I avoided the babies and children and hope I didn’t pass the cold along. I spent most of last week in bed but am now back in the office and hoping that is all behind me.

The courts have reopened in Ethiopia. AAI had cases originally scheduled for the first days after the reopening, but the court staff was sent to training during the first two weeks after reopening so all cases were delayed. We now have 10 cases or so scheduled to be heard in the next 10 days. Fifteen new cases were filed the week that the court reopened and we expect more to be filed soon.In order to keep the amount of time between referral and court filing shorter, we will not be referring children until Temesgen has told us that the child’s legal documents are complete and that all relinquishment or abandonment paperwork has been obtained. During the past few months, many families have felt in limbo while our staff had to go back and get new relinquishment or abandonment paperwork due to changes in adoption rules. We are working to avoid this, though it may mean that the wait for referrals will be longer for awhile.

On the other hand, we have already begun to see that the numbers of babies and young children arriving at AAI is increasing. Historically this has been the pattern; many babies are received at Layla during the period after the rainy season. We are now working with some additional orphanages as well and some of these are sending us toddlers. In the past we have not had many toddlers available for placement and we are reorganizing space a bit at Wanna to provide well for them. In the upcoming newsletter you will see pictures of the toddlers learning and playing.

Last month you were sent information on keeping your I-600a file current. From now on, before making a referral to a family, we will be checking the status of their visa application. It is important that children not be delayed in travel because the family’s visa file is not current and we will be more attentive to those who are behind on this.There have been a few referrals lately but not much movement on the list as we are waiting for the go ahead from the legal department before making new referrals. There are lots of babies and young children in the nursery and we hope to begin calling families very soon.

Sincerely,
Merrily and Susan H.

3 Months

Today is a milestone in our adoption journey. When we signed with our adoption agency they told us the average wait at that point was 0-3 months for infant boys. Here we are. 3 months into "The Wait". They are still handing out February infant boy referrals. So, obviously no where close.

I've read lots of people who at this point (when they reach the maximum wait their agency gave them to start) are very agitated. Annoyed, frustrated, discouraged. I am glad to say that I am not feeling any of these things.

Maybe the slow down in adoptions is because there are lots more people adopting from Ethiopia currently... But maybe, just maybe, it's because more families are able to keep their children.

...and in my book that's the best possible situation.

Having lost a child myself in 2006 I would NEVER hope that a family would have to go through that. Even if it means that I sit on the wait list forever. Although yes, I am anxious to meet the newest addition to our family, I am all too aware that in order for me to gain a son someone has to lose one. That is something that I would never wish on anyone.

So - as we wait patiently, and prayerfully, we continue to hope that maybe it's taking so much longer than expected because more families are staying together.

Happy 3 months on the waiting list!

No Computer

Hey everyone,

We are officially without a computer. Bummer. Thus, the obvious lack of blog posts. Yes, I have access to a computer every few days, but never enough time to sit and really let my thoughts, feelings, and experiences flow onto the computer. I always blog after the kids go to bed at night and obviously can't leave the house after that to go use someone else's computer.

So - I've had tons of blog posts swimming around in my head, but who knows how long it's going to be before they come to frutation. I miss you all, and someday I'll be back...

I just don't know when.

My Uncensored Thoughts on Neighborhood Animals

I hate animals that run around the neighborhood!

Honestly, I can not say that I hate the owners of these animals, because some of them (2 on my street) are very nice people. Unfortunately I HIGHLY disagree with their decision to let their animals run wild around the neighborhood. Okay, so I know that one of these people consider her cat and dog her pets. Maybe the other couple on the street doesn't really consider the (who knows how many) cats their pets...but they are the only ones who feed them. To me, that shows that they are taking responsibility for them and therefore, qualifies them as pet owners in my eyes.

I came home a few days ago to a trash bag completely ripped open and the contents strewn all across my front porch, yard, and driveway. One of the stupid neighborhood cats. I, in the pouring rain, was then forced to put on rubber gloves, get a new trash bag, and clean up the contents of the original bag. Boy was I mad.

I despise the cat prints on my car. The dog poop in my yard infuriates me. I hate getting out of bed and opening my front door to yell at the cats who are fighting on my driveway and keeping me up at 2 a.m. The trash bag sent me over the edge.

"Neighborhood" cats...you are now classified as stray cats in my eyes and I WILL call the animal control (do we even have one of those in STJ?) next time I see you on the prowl. No more nice rubs when we're walking down the street. You'd better not cross my path.

It's Okay, Your Kids Are Here

When one of my kids is hurting in some way, physically, emotionally, etc. You will overhear me whisper in their ear, "It's okay, Mommy is here". I want my children to always have confidence that even when it doesn't feel okay, Mommy is always doing her best to make it okay. I want them to know that I will always be there, whether it is in person, over the phone, or tucked away deep in their heart to comfort them in their times of need.

I realized something today. Even on some of the worst days, as long as I can cuddle my kids up onto my lap and hug them, I'll be okay. They may even be the reason for my stress, anger, frustration, or tears. But as long as they will give me a hug I feel something deep in my soul start to settle.

Sometimes I just need to breathe in their scent slowly and deeply. Wrap their fingers around mine, and rest my head against theirs. My kids are such a huge comfort to me. Is it because they are part of me? Is it because I know that they are two of the only people that I'm guaranteed to always have a relationship with? (Because after my experience I know that losing your kids isn't worth anything else in the world.)

Whatever the reason, I'm okay - as long as my kids are here.

An email to a friend

This is part of an email to a dear friend of mine that I wrote this evening. I just wanted to record my thoughts tonight:

"Thank you for the prayers. This journey has stretched us individually, and as a couple more than we could've ever imagined...that's for sure. I have learned more about the heart of God in the last few months than in my previous 26 years. I feel like, for the first time in my life, I am walking the path that He set out for me. The one that is closest to Him. I feel him present in my life like never before, and amazingly, it's not as comfortable as I thought it would be, but that's what's so exhilerating about it! It's so awesome feeling like I have to lean on Him daily to get through rather than looking to Him only when times are at their worst. I feel a passion inside that I've never found before. I'm only sad that it took me 26 years to find this!! I feel confident that this is what my life is supposed to be about - standing in the gap for the orphans of the world. Advocating for them when no one else will. Loving them like Christ loves me. I can't wait to get to Ethiopia and love on the children there!"

My TV "no" list

I recently had a friend, Amanda, ask me what my TV "no" list was for my kids. I think TV is such a touchy subject, so please don't be offended if one of my "no's" is an "okay" for your kids or family. I'm not even going to explain why it's a no for our family...just list. We really don't like having TV in our home and will be getting rid of it when our contract runs out in a little less than a year.

1. Sponge Bob Square Pants
2. Any Japanese Anime' style shows (Pokemon, etc.)
3. All adult shows with the exception of Extreme Home Makeover, Biggest Loser, Sports games, and If Walls Could Talk
4. Suite Life of Zack and Cody*

There were lots more when Hunter was little, but more because they were super annoying to me rather than because I felt like they were a bad influence on my kids. I'm sure there are more, but since Hunter can't read yet and I am the one controling the remote I don't even pay attention to what they are!

There are a few that I feel kind of guilty about.

1. Biggest Loser. I love that show and it's on Tuesday nights. Once in a great while I will be able to catch the very end of the show when I get home from work. Since Hunter is still awake at that time and I've been gone from him for several hours I like to snuggle him right before bed and catch the end of the show at the same time. Selfish, I know. Most of the time I watch it online after the kids go to bed though. I think it's good for him to see that people can have problems with their weight and to learn to be sensitive to it. I think it's good for him to see them working hard to change their lives. I don't like the profanity (but it's always bleeped out) that is sometimes thrown in there. I don't like him seeing Bob and Jillian scream in people's faces, but we do talk about how that's not a good way to communicate with others.

2. Wizards of Waverly Place. I think this is a cute show, but don't feel 100% positive about the "wizard" part of it. Hunter knows that there is no such thing as wizards, but still you know it goes somewhere in that vault of a brain... It also sometimes has inappropriate boy/girl relationships. I know some out there think we're WAY off the deep end with trying to instill in our kids that boys and girls shouldn't kiss until they are married, but that's our decision, and so we don't like allowing him to see that on television.

Saying that...Wizards of Waverly Place is not NEARLY as bad with the boy/girl thing as...

3. The Suite Life of Zack and Cody. We used to let Hunter watch this show all the time and found it to be extremely funny actually! Unfortunately it seems that more and more it's more about "who likes who" than the twins getting into mishap funny situations. There is tons of "daydreams" about what it would be like to date or kiss another character. Way too much real kissing of others, and always fighting over who can be someone else's boyfriend or girlfriend. We no longer chose this for him to watch. There are times when it comes on after the show he is watching and depending on the episode we allow him to watch it

We also always try to read reviews or talk to others who have already seen a movie before we let him watch one of those.

What is on your "no" list?

Rev Run Tweet

Good morning! Do a checkup from the neck up! Let's keep our minds in tune! Thinking positively with an exclamation point will win the game today!

My favorite time of year

Dear Basketball Season,

Maybe I'm being a bit facetious when I say you are my favorite time of year...but maybe not. Maybe I really actually enjoy my husband being gone for 3 hours every evening for practice and gone the entire night for games. Maybe I love the fact that Lincoln and I have very few conversations that don't include a basketball play, a basketball player, or the recap of a game. I'm blessed to be able to watch and sometimes even try new drills for practice before he actually uses them on the boys. Okay - so I am totally lying. You are definitely not my favorite time of year.

You do, however occur during some of my favorite times of year! I adore the changes of the leaves, the crisp weather, the pumpkin patches, the fall decorations, the hay rides, the Thanksgiving turkey, the 7 Layer Salad, Graysen's birthday, mall Christmas decorations, chi lattes, Christmas music, and all the celebrations of Christ's birthday!

I do like that you are an indoor sport. I do enjoy that my kids can run in the commons while I keep an eye on the game. I do like that we see more of our fellow coaches and their families during this time of year.

I do love seeing my husband active in something that he adores. I do smile from the inside when he wants to talk about and pray for the boys on his team daily. I love that he takes his role as a coach and influence on his players life so seriously.

I enjoy the fact that Lincoln gets his fill of basketball during the week and therefore we are not forced to watch very many hours of it on TV. I adore the fact that because he is gone from us so much during these long months that he really appreciates the few hours that we do have as a family. He is more present during these times than any other time of year.

So, dearest basketball season...although you have your negative aspects, you have some pretty decent ones too.

Love,
A Coach's Wife who resigns herself to see her husband again in March

Hunter and Graysen's New Favorite

My kids are in love with Tom and Jerry!!  We just recently started watching this classic cartoon and it's their new favorite!  I especially enjoy the fact that there is mostly music and very little talking.  I love to hear them laughing and laughing at all the silly antics.  

Can I Live?

I don't know much about Nick Cannon or what he believes or stands for, but I am proud to see someone of influence sharing their story and encouraging others to think before taking negative action!

Our Toy Story Date

Lincoln and I took Hunter on a date to Opening Night of Toy Story 1 and 2 Double Feature in 3D! It's only playing for 2 weeks, so we wanted to go on Opening Night! We so rarely get to both do anything with our kids one on one that we were all very excited about it! My sister kept Graysen for us and we headed to Sullivan for the movies! We got there pretty early because I was afraid they might sell out... We got our tickets and a large soda and popcorn (with free refills) and headed in to find our seats. There were approximately 5 families in the whole theater!

Even though we've seen both those movies a thousand times a piece it was still quite exciting to see them in the theater and in 3D! We refilled our popcorn 2 times and our soda 3 times! Yikes! I've never seen Hunter sit on the edge of his seat and eat popcorn like that before! I thought he might turn into a piece of popcorn before it was over! He was precious quoting movie lines and laughing out loud.

I'm so blessed that we are able to take our kids to do special things like that together. To me, those are the kinds of thing memories are made of. I hope that he always remembers that he is special to us and that we have always strived to take time to spend with him alone. We sure love our precious first born son!**I have some cute pictures of us on our date, but unfortunately my computer is down again, so until I get it back I can't add any pictures! Boo......

Fashion Rules Children's Book

If anyone is interested in publishing a children's book I have a request.

I want a "touch and feel" book that explains basic fashion rules to children.  We're talking just the basics here.  I want them to know how to match colors (for example you shouldn't wear a red pair of pants with an orange shirt), and realize that you can't wear sweatpants with a nice sweater.  Learn that football pants should be saved for playing in the yard, not going to a birthday party.  I want them to be able to feel different materials so that they understand what material a sweatshirt is made out of vs. dress pants.  

Hunter has always been very particular about what clothes he wears...unfortunately they don't always match.  There is that cute stage around 2 years old where they are first learning to pick out their own clothes that it doesn't really matter what they wear out because it's just so sweet that they are finally having an opinion.  

Then there's 5 years old where they still have a (very strong) opinion, but no fashion sense whatsoever...  And it's not so cute when they don't match anymore...  I try to continue to give him a choice each morning because I think it's important for him to learn to make decisions on his own...but it's getting harder and harder to "reason" with him when his choices don't make sense at all!

HELP!

Adoption T-Shirts! **Updated

Great News! We placed an order for 37 shirts this morning! How awesome is that?! We have been blessed with such awesome family and friends and a wonderful community to support us ! We had two more orders come in this afternoon, so I'm off to get another order of at least 12 hopefully by next week...so, if you're thinking about purchasing one (or a few) let me know in the next couple of days and I'll get them in this next order!

We wanted to send everyone an update on the adoption! We are a little more then 2 months into the "waiting" phase. Right now all of our paperwork is done and in Ethiopia. We are just waiting until God has our child ready for us! We don't expect to hear anything until well after the new year...

So, to help pass the time, and save up for our traveling expenses, we are having T-Shirts made! We are hoping that these shirts will help raise adoption awareness everywhere they are worn around the country!

A picture of the T-shirt design is at the top of this post. They will be a greyish blue short sleeved t-shirt with off-white print. We are selling them for 15.00 or two for 25.00! We can order them from youth small (6-8) all the way through Adult XL. We can also get XXL (for 16.00) or XXXL (for 17.00). We can take cash or checks can be made to Lincoln or Ashley Redburn.

We have to place orders in groups of 12 or more, so as soon as we have 12 we will place the order and then wait for another 12 orders to come in. They should take under 2 weeks to get back after the order is placed.

Please forward this message on to anyone you know that may want to help advocate for the 147 million orphans of the world!

You can email me, snail mail me, or call me with your order and we will get them to you asap!

Thanks so much!!!
Lincoln and Ashley

215 LoisSaint James, Mo 65559

ashleyredburn@hotmail.com

573-263-0258

Adoption Update and T-Shirts!

We wanted to give everyone an update on the adoption! I can't write much about it on this public blog due to laws, so if you have any questions about specifics please comment and I'll invite you to our private adoption blog which should give you LOTS more detials!

We are a little more then 2 months into the "waiting" phase. Right now all of our paperwork is done and in the birth country. We are just waiting until God has our child ready for us! We don't expect to hear anything until well after the new year...

So, to help pass the time, and save up for our traveling expenses, we are having T-Shirts made! We are hoping that these shirts will help raise adoption awareness everywhere they are worn around the country!

A picture of the T-shirt design is on top. They will be a greyish blue short sleeved t-shirt with off-white print. We are selling them for 15.00 or two for 25.00! We can order them from youth small (6-8) all the way through Adult XL. We can also get XXL (for 16.00) or XXXL (for 17.00). We can take cash or checks can be made to Lincoln or Ashley Redburn.

We have to place orders in groups of 12 or more, so as soon as we have 12 we will place the order and then wait for another 12 orders to come in. They should take under 2 weeks to get back after the order is placed.

Please pass this message on to anyone you know that may want to help advocate for the 147 million orphans of the world!

Feel free to comment with any questions or orders!

Thanks so much!!!
Lincoln and Ashley

ashleyredburn@hotmail.com

Just who I am

Some of you may have noticed that my little family has become all but absent in the community since May.  Some of you may not have noticed at all, but regardless...this has been the case. 

Lincoln and I had entered into a stage in our lives where we were extremely unhappy.  We were working almost around the clock, making no time for us and our children.  We had overcommitted ourselves to everything - jobs, social lives, extra curricular activities, volunteer positions.  We felt a huge strain on our relationship and the relationship with our children.  

Finally, one day in March we were able to sit down and take a look at where our lives had ended up.  We weren't happy with it.  It was time for a change.  We decided to cut out nearly everything that wasn't of utmost importance to the health of our family and our relationship with God.  So, in May I quit baby sitting, we quit soccer and t-ball.  Summer was beginning and I wasn't going to be working as much at The Dance Studio.  I made a commitment not to work at anything that I couldn't have my kids with me except 1 week of camp over the summer.  We continued Bible Study on Wednesday nights, but that was the extent of our commitments through August.  

Although we don't have nearly the social life that we once had, we are more satisfied now.  Our spirits and minds are calmer.  We have time for one another.  Time to grow a marriage that is going to last a lifetime.  We are able to raise our children in the way that we feel The Lord has called us to.  Our children are healthier, happier kids.  We have time to explore the surrounding communities and teach them things about real life.  

Although life has "picked up" a little bit again - I've started teaching dance 3 evenings a week, and Hunter has started pre-school 2 mornings a week this year I still feel settled.  I feel content with what is in our lives.  

I read a woman who I think might be my "soul sister"...here was a portion of her blog post from a few days ago...I love the way she simply stated her (and my) situation.

"Life has been simplified. I know I’ve alluded to this, and how hard it has been to untangle ourselves from unhealthy expectations. But for us, this has been necessary and life-giving. To say “no”… to only focus on our little family and what can fill our souls for this season of our lives. It’s been full of healing and quality time together. Our kids are thriving… and the protective mama bear in me is calmer. I see that things have settled… that my kids are in a good place… and I’d like to stay in this place with them for awhile. I’m not the person who can do it all. Sometimes I really wish that I was “that girl”. I’ve always wanted to be the bubbly popular one who gets involved in everything and who is loved by all. As I grow older I realize it’s okay to release that image of myself… and that maybe, just maybe, some folks will be okay with me being me."

Amen Sister.  Amen.

God through a 22 month old

When asked to pronounce "God" Graysen comes back with something that undeniably sounds like "Die".  Every. single. time.  There is no mistake.  While Hunter was laughing over this in the back seat the other day it really got me thinking.

To me, "God" and "Die" are very much the same.  In order to have a relationship with God we need to die to self.  In order to be saved we need to die.  In order to have everlasting life with Him we have to die.  

Thanks Gray, for the  reminder.

A Hand Full

Today Hunter had this conversation with a friend:

Hunter:  "I'm five"

Friend:  "I'm three"

Hunter:  "Yeah, I'm a hand full"

Friend:  "Someday I'll be five and be a hand full too!"

So sweet and innocent...but my girlfriend and I couldn't help but notice the play on words...Five IS a hand full!

Plan B

We are Plan B for this baby's life.  

Luckily, I'm okay with that!  God's first plan is for every child to stay with their birth family.  That is why He gave them to those parents.  Because of our fallen and broken world, that is not always possible.  So...Plan B comes into play.  That's us.  We are Plan B.  

We will always love our son's birth parents.  I hope that we are able to know some of their story to share with him.  If not, I trust that he will be at peace with knowing that although he may not know his biological story, he will know that he is a son of God's and ours...and that we both love him unconditionally.

We are so blessed that God is going to place him in our lives.  We will forever be connected to Ethiopia.  Part of our son will always be there, and therefore part of our hearts will be as well.

When we started this process I was so unsure of where all the money was going to come from, so unsure about how this small community would accept a little boy from Ethiopia, so unsure about so many things.  But the two things I did know were that a)  God calls us to care for the orphans and b) there were children out there going to bed every night without a mommy and a daddy to tuck them in and calm their fears.  I knew that they needed a family and that is one thing I think we do well.  

We have a family.  A family who loves each other unconditionally.  A family who is committed to each other.  A family that is committed to the King of kings.  

We can do family...so let's do it!

   

In Process Update

Dear Adoptive Family,

Today I leave again for Ethiopia. It will be a short trip with some specific goals and I don’t expect to be able to spend much time with the kids, unfortunately.

One goal is to try to get status reports on the legal process for each case. Gail has said, however, to remind families that there won’t be much change in most cases. September is not a month when a great deal gets accomplished in Ethiopia. The courts will reopen in a few days and we hope to see things moving again. A number of cases are ready to be filed with court as soon as the office reopens. The legal process has been hampered by massive changes in the process for adoptions, mostly the relinquishment procedures and also by changes in leadership in some key offices. Notably, the Ministry of Women’s Affairs, which oversees adoption on the federal level, has changed directors in the adoption office itself. The new person has worked in this office for some time and is known to Temesgen, our attorney, and he believes that this will be a positive change.

Many of you may have seen or heard of the news story from Australia regarding adoption from Ethiopia. It concerned child trafficking in Ethiopia and targeted a particular U.S. agency. Child trafficking is an issue of grave concern to all who care about orphan children and who would like to see them in good adoptive homes. The Ethiopian government has responded by setting up new and ever stricter guidelines and requiring that all recognized agencies go through a new registration process. AAI commends the Ethiopian government for taking positive action to deal with this issue.

Six or seven referrals of infant and toddler children were made last week and I received a number of inquiries as to whether this means that there will be no more referrals for awhile. We refer children to families on the waiting list as the children’s files are completed. Most of the little ones referred last week came into our care in August but there are additional babies in our nursery, both girls and boys, whose files are not yet complete. Once we get full information, those babies can be referred to families. We usually receive babies one or two at time, sometimes several in a week. The pattern is irregular which is why it is so hard to give good numbers to our families in terms of timing. 

There is one last family whose dossier was sent in November who will receive the next baby girl referral. Then we will start on December families. For baby boys, we will be referring to families whose dossiers went in mid-February.

There are many new families in process and I want to give some reminders for those traveling.

Remember that it is not allowed for families to carry gifts to children from their new adoptive families. Each child receives a welcome bag, then no further gifts or packages until placement. It is not fair to other children to see those who have families receiving gifts on a regular basis and we instituted this rule several years ago.

Please be considerate of staff when photographing children, in terms of interrupting their work to ask for certain children or babies. Older children cannot be taken out of class for photos. We also ask that you not give messages to the kids from their families. You may give them letters and photos that their parents have sent but messages can be easily misunderstood. Above all do not tell children that their parents are coming on a certain date. If the children ask, be vague, saying that they want to come as soon as all of the paperwork is finished.

If you are in Ethiopia adopting an older child and have given your child an iPod or other expensive item, please do not allow your child to take the item to Layla. Ivy makes this request saying it sends the wrong message to other children who then expect that they will get an iPod (for example) when their parents come. And again, it really isn’t fair to children who do not yet have families. 

For families who are using an escort, we have decided to no longer ask families to pack a travel bag but instead the staff will pack a bag in Ethiopia with clothing that will fit the child, and items we know the child will enjoy on the flight. We are in need of some travel bags to use for this purpose, backpacks or medium sized travel bags work best. Used is fine but they should not have wheels. Diaper bags typically are padded and take up too much space to work well. Any bags can be sent to the AAI office or if you are traveling but can leave an extra one for an escort trip, just give it to Gail in Ethiopia. 

The fundraising effort for the Holiday Project has begun. Details are available on the AAI blog, www.aainews.blogspot.com and I hope you will take a minute to read about what is planned and to contribute as you can. We were delighted to have the kick off donation of $1000 toward this project from one of our adoptive families.

I’ll try to write to the aaiethiopia list from Ethiopia.

Merrily and Susan H. 

Bath Time

I read this on Spirit FM and I just couldn't not share with you all.  I must admit...I TOTALLY feel like telling my kids (and husband) this verbatim some days...

"Bath Note"

Dear Kids,

Don't be alarmed, the world isn't coming to an end. I am simply taking a bath. It will take about thirty minutes and will involve soap and water. Yes, I know how to swim. Even if I didn't, forcing myself to drown in a half-inch of lukewarm water is more work than I've got energy for. (Which reminds me, I'm all for science projects, but the next time you want to see if Play-Doh floats, use cold water.)

Don't panic if I'm not out right on time. I've heard that people don't dissolve in water and I'd like to test the theory. While I'm in the tub, I'd like you to remember a few things. The large slab of wood between us is called a door. Do not bang to hear my voice. I promise that even though you can't see me, I *am* on the other side. I'm not digging an escape tunnel and running for the border, no matter what I said a while ago. I didn't mean it. Honest. There will be plenty of time later to tell me about your day.

"Later" means at a time when I am no longer naked, wet, and contemplating bubble gum in the blow dryer. I know you have important things to tell me. Please let one of them be that you have invented a new way to blow bubbles, not a new way to add gum to your hair.

Believe it or not, shouting, "TELEPHONE!" through the closed bathroom door will *not* make the phone stop ringing. Answer it and take a message. Since Amazing Mind-Reading Mom has the day off, you'll need to write that message down. Use paper and a pencil. Do not use your brother and the laundry marker. We can't send him to school with telephone number tattoos.

Water makes me wet, not deaf. I can still tell the difference between the sound of "nothing" and the sound of a child playing the piano with a basketball. I can also hear you tattling at the top of your lungs. I'm *choosing* NOT to answer you.

Don't call your dad at work and tell him I am unconscious in the bathroom. He didn't appreciate it last time. He won't appreciate it more this time. Trust me.

No matter how much I would like it, water does not make me forgetful. I remember who you are and why you are grounded. No, you can't go toShelby's house to play. No, you can't go to Shelby's house to use the bathroom. If someone is in our other bathroom, you will just have to think dry thoughts and wait. Unless you have four feet and a tail, do not think of going outside to "water" the lawn. I know the dog does it. The neighbors don't feel the need to call me when the dog does it.

Unless the house catches on fire, stay inside and keep the doors locked. Do not go outside and throw rocks at the bathroom window to get my attention. I know it works in the movies. This is reality, the place where people don't like to sit in a tub while rocks and broken glass rain in on them. Do not set the house on fire. Call me if there is an emergency.

Emergencies ARE:

1. Dad has fallen off the roof.
2. Your brother and/or sister is bleeding.
3. There's a red fire truck in front of our house.

Emergencies are NOT:

1. Dad has fallen asleep.
2. Someone on TV is bleeding.
3. There's a red pickup truck in front of our house.

One other thing: Being forced to use the last roll of toilet paper for a towel does not make me happy. It makes me sticky with little white polka dots. In the future, when the tub overflows, use a mop to clean up the water instead of every towel in the house. For my sanity's sake, let's pretend it was the tub, Okay? No, I don't want to hear the real story. Ever. Especially not while I'm standing in the pool of water you missed.

By the way, all Play-Doh experiments are hereby canceled.

Be good. Entertain yourselves. Yes, you can do both at the same time. Try coloring, playing a game, or paying that stack of bills on the coffee table.

I'll be out soon. Maybe.

Love,

Your Mom

Could it be true?

I've (unfortunately) always kind of been a "see before I believe it" kind of girl. This, of course, makes me extremely skeptical of all kinds of theories.

I needed a solution to wanting / needing to hold Graysen and help Hunter / do housework at the same time. I needed something that would keep my hands free - so...I got a Moby Wrap.

The woman who sold it to me (who now owns a wonderful little shop called Sprouting Up) told me about all the benefits that it would bring to me and the bonding process with my new little one. Sure, sure I thought...I bonded just fine with Hunter and I never carried him in a wrap...

But now, almost 2 years later, I do feel that in fact, Graysen may be more bonded to me than Hunter was at this age. I still carry Gray around approximately 3 days a week for the first hour or so of the day in the Moby. She just needs it to wake up and feel secure before she starts off for her day. She is much more cuddly then Hunter ever was. She loves to be close to my body, whether it's laying on my stomach in bed, sitting on my lap, standing behind me twirling my hair, or having me carry her around.

Maybe this is just a coinsidence, and she is just a more "touchy" kid. Maybe, it's because she's a girl. Maybe it's because I carried her close to my body several hours everyday while she was little...

Who knows...but could it be true?

Ephesians 6:12

There is a store in town that has this verse on their flashing sign. It's just a few blocks from my house and so every time I drive past there I wonder what the verse is. I always mean to come home and look it up, but alas, I always forget.

Last night I remembered:

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of thie dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the healvenly realms."

Wow. I know I'll remember everytime I drive past there from now on...

My 5 favorite books on my bookshelves

I love to read.  Luckily I'm able to borrow tons of books from friends and family so that my hobby doesn't get too expensive!  I don't actually purchase many books, but here is the list of my Top 5 favorites (in no particular order) that are actually ON my bookshelves:

1. In Praise of Stay-At-Home Moms by Dr. Laura Schlessinger (given to me by Kelley)
2. Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge (purchased for a book study through church)
3. The Wednesday Letters by Jason Wright (one of my purchases on one of my "author kicks")
4. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman (I've owned this since my HS choir teacher recommended it my senior year of HS)  (yes, Chrissy, I found it!) 
5. Red Hot Monogamy by Bill and Pam Farrell (purchased after I heard them speak at the Hearts At Home Conference last year)

If you haven't read these books I highly suggest that you do!  

A Natural Little Mother

Here is my precious little girl practicing her Mommy skills.  We take a baby with us almost everywhere we go, although I don't always allow her to take it inside because she refuses to leave it dressed.  

Gray, showing off  how she soothed her favorite baby...  The baby has a white mark across it's face and she brought it to me, pointed to it, and said "hurt".  Then she pretended to cry.  So I told her to cuddle and rock her baby and the baby would feel better.  After she paced around the house several times, she said, "baby good".  

Apparently this is where she changes her baby's diaper (even though it doesn't wear one).  She kept going to this corner and saying "diaper, diaper"...  
This is the first time Graysen has instigated wearing her baby.  She actually brought me the blanket and tried to wrap it around her.  I have to admit...my heart smiled!

Everyone needs kisses!!!

After I got done taking the pictures above she wanted to look at them.  At the end she wanted me to take another one of the baby.  Before I took it she turned the baby's face to face me and shoved it in the camera lens...apparently she noticed that there were no pictures of the baby smiling!  

I notice more and more how much Graysen wants to help me around the house and how she mimics me with her own dolls.  It got me thinking about my childhood and how I always knew that my first priority in life was to be a wife and a mother.  I know now, that this is because my mother took great pride in her job as a homemaker.  She was a dedicated wife, a wonderful housekeeper, and the best mother imaginable!  My mom was always very hands on with my sister and I growing up, involving us in everything she did each day, and making sure that we were learning as we went.  I never remember her showing frustration with us, or laying around on the couch.  She was not an "accidental parent" (I just learned this phrase from a friend...more on that later).  Everything she did had a reason and a method behind it.  I never saw frustration from her about being "stuck" in the house with two young children every day.  

I know that me being adamant about being a stay at home mom was because my mother was one, and I couldn't imagine my childhood any other way...  Do you think you run your household the same way you were raised?

Another reason I'm blessed

There are a thousand (or more) reasons I'm a blessed woman and mother, but here are just two more of them...

I'm blessed to have these two men in my kids life who will play and be silly with them!


You might have to look hard to see Chad in that top picture...you should've seen what he went through to get up there with Graysen...and in the middle of Chuck E. Cheese!

Lincoln just laid in that ball pit trying his best to defend himself...it was a challenge for sure!

My beautiful baby girl

My biggest regret as a parent

I have a confession.  

There are days when bedtime can't be soon enough.  There are times when 10 minutes after we wake up I wonder when it's going to be time for me to leave for work, or when bedtime will come.

Wishing days with my kids away are my biggest regret as a parent.  Even in the midst of my wishing, I am aware I will live to regret it.  I know that someday I will beg for one more day with my children small.  

But sometimes, when they won't sit still at the dinner table, when I have to wipe the runny nose every 2 minutes, when I just can't seem to get along with Hunter...sometimes, I must confess, I wish it was bedtime.  The time when the house is dark and quiet and I can sit and journal my thoughts, eat a favorite snack and sit in front of the TV, or escape in a wonderful novel.  Time to myself when I can spend some quiet time with God letting Him rejuvenate me for the next day to come...

and luckily, they always seem a bit better than the day before.

171-H - Yea!...maybe?

Yea! We got our 171-H back in the mail today! It definitely took longer than 3 weeks, but we have plenty of time, so why does it really matter?! ha ha. I told Lincoln as we were pulling up in the drive way that I was going to call and check on the status of it tomorrow...and there it was, waiting for us in our mailbox! God has perfect timing!

Unfortunately, my excitement was dashed when I opened it up and read that we were approved for children 0-18 months...uh, what happened to 0-4 years old?! Reading on, on page 2 it is quoted from our homestudy, 0-4 years...so I'm really confused. I immediately looked over my application to make sure I didn't make a mistake and put only 0-18 months, but I didn't... So, step 2: Immediately call Homeland Security and leave a message (of course) explaining the problem and asking them to call back Step 3: Directly after hanging up the phone shoot an email to AAI asking them what to do!!! Hopefully I'll hear back from SOMEONE tomorrow and get this problem solved!!!

I'll keep you updated....

Are there words?

Are there sufficient words?

a wonderful night filled with great conversation on the way to and from STL with my husband

a super yummy meal at a new restaurant

a hug from a friend I don't get to see enough

smiles of their baby

lots of laughs

encouragement on all kinds of parenting issues

great Christian fellowship

funny stories

plans to see each other again the next weekend!!!

The solution

I spent the first 42 minutes of Graysen's day with her screaming, crying, and latching herself on to my neck.  She kept telling me she was hungry, but I couldn't for the life of me find what she wanted to eat.  I offered bagels, cinnamon and sugar toast, several kinds of cereal (even with milk in it), granola bars, Nutri-Grain bars, bananas, nectarines, juice, milk (even chocolate milk), water, and finally a pop-tart!  

Eventually, we found ourselves sitting in the kitchen chair, eating a pop-tart with both of mommy's arms wrapped around her waist (every time I tried to move one of them she promptly wrapped it back), rocking back and forth while Mommy whispered in her ear.  I reminded her that I loved her more than she'll ever know, (or maybe just until she has a daughter of her own.)  I told her that she was beautiful just like God made her.  I prayed for her day, asking God to comfort whatever insecurity she had this morning.  We talked about going to the park when Daddy got off work.  

Sometimes we girls just need to be wrapped in our Mommy's arms, eating a favorite comfort food, being reminded of how much we mean to someone.  We need to know that we're good enough just as we are, that God made us perfect in His eyes, and that's all that really matters.  I'm so blessed to parent this little beauty...

even when she is screaming "NO THANK YOU" in my ear for the first 42 minutes of the day!!

Commandment # 10 is REALLY HARD

I have been teaching Hunter the 10 Commandments.  We focus on one Commandment every day.  We have a song that we sing together everyday...it's been really fun!  

It just kind of hit me the other day that I only have 1 year to prepare his mind and heart for being away from me all day at Kindergarten next year.  I want him to be equipped with beliefs, laws, and rules that will keep him strong and close to God while he is under other's influences for 6 hours, 5 days a week.  I realize how blessed I have been to (thus far) have had control over who he is influenced by...I have been able to choose which family, friends, kids, adults, caregivers, etc. that he has been with for 5 whole years!  

Here is an email I got from my mom:  

"Hunter mentioned seeing a "remote control airplane" when you were at a "big yardsale" the other day.  Do you think that's something he'd like for Christmas?

 The cutest part is that we were talking about the ten commandments and he told me it's REALLY HARD not to want something one of his friends have!  :)  Bless his SWEET SWEET heart."

This note makes me realize what a precious 5 year old boy I really have!  First of all, he didn't even MENTION the remote control airplane at the sale the other day!!!  I don't know many 5 year old boys who wouldn't bug their moms to death about something as cool as that if they saw it!  I had told him before we went in not to touch anything, and totally obeyed me and didn't touch anything that he didn't ask before hand...  

Hunter just has a heart of gold, and a special woman is going to be a very lucky wife and mother some day. I already pray for my kids' spouses, and am excited to see who God brings into their lives!